What is Swinging?
Swinging is a form of recreational social sex between consenting adults, most commonly consisting of male/female couples meeting other male/female couples for sex and/or ongoing intimate friendships.
Swinging (otherwise known as "the life style" or - less commonly these days - "wife swapping") can take a variety of different forms. Although single women are usually welcomed with open arms at all swinging clubs there are few venues which allow access for single guys. At La Chambre we have an open and non-exclusive membership policy and encourage single guys to join the club and join us for our weekly Friday Night and Sunday Night parties.
Swinging clubs can be "on-premises" (which means that one may interact sexually with others at that event) or "off-premises" (which means that one would generally go back to the home or hotel room of other couples for sex, after deciding to do so at the event). La Chambre is an "on-premises" venue where couples may have sex using our purpose built facilities. Of course, some people would rather use the club to meet other couples or singles and then go "off-premises" for the main event; that's fine by us as long they enjoy themselves.
Newspapers and magazines which carry personal ads for swingers also exist, although many of the magazines simply charge for forwarding letters. The Internet is now a powerful medium for bringing proponents of the scene together and this means that less people now use the "small ads" as a way of reaching out to others.
Swingers have traditionally been largely middle class and tend to blend in quite easily with the general population in terms of appearance and ideology. In the last few years, particularly with the increased use of the Internet, the scene has broadened and people from all walks of life are now part of this dynamic and ever changing way of life. At La Chambre, we welcome people of all colours and creeds.
Why might I want to "swing"?
People may be attracted to the swinging scene for one or more of many reasons:
- Interest in having sex with people other than their "Life Partners" or "Significant Others"
- Watching people having sex in order to learn new skills or techniques
- As a catalyst for improving their sex lives and relationships
- As a way of "rebelling" against the repressive attitudes of society towards open sexuality
- As a way of meeting people and forming friendships with like minded people
- As a way of exploring personal boundaries and limitations.
- Simply to get laid!
Although the swinging scene is unfortunately not always the best place to explore male bisexuality, it is an environment in which bisexual women and women who are curious about their bisexual tendencies will feel instantly at home. Many of the women who swing (either alone or as part of a mixed gender couple) are bisexual and this type of behaviour is actively encouraged by both men (who want to watch) and women (who want to do). The freedom for women to explore their bisexuality is sometimes the deciding factor which makes many couples take the plunge. At La Chambre, we have a high number of bisexually active women who are always happy to gently initiate newcomers to the scene.
We recommend that men wishing to explore their bi-side do so on a bi night which we run on the second Monday of every month.
One thing we would like to point out is that many men would like to see their partners having sex with another woman. Quite frankly, we feel that it can be the most beautiful experience to watch two women making love to each other. However, men would be wise to remember that this has to be something the lady wants to do and SHE should be the one to instigate any approaches. There is nothing worse than seeing a man wandering forlornly around the club asking women if they'd like to have sex with his partner!
You should also realise that when you are talking to a couple you should engage BOTH of them in conversation. This is particularly relevant to single guys on a Friday Night. We see many of them only ever talking to the ladies and ignoring the male partner - you are more likely to click with the lady if you click with the couple. After all, would you share your partner with someone who didn't have the decency to speak to you?
In the past, swingers seem to have been somewhat unaware of (or perhaps confused by) alternative sexual practices such as BDSM or Tantric Sex. This is changing (perhaps due to the improved communication channels afforded by the Internet), and these days you will find people in the scene who are knowledgeable about many of these more specialised areas of the sexual spectrum. Some forms of BDSM more extreme than spanking or very light bondage may make people uncomfortable, and this is one of the reasons why we hold a fetish night on the third Thursday of every month for serious players only who love rubber, leather, goth, vamps, trannies, bondage, S&M and all the other stuff that the usual party goers simply play at.
Some modern women will no doubt find the swinging scene to be a welcome dose of sanity in an increasingly insane world. Our culture is often cruel to women who enjoy sex and see nothing wrong with going out and getting it. For example, how many times have you heard a women called a "slag" or a "slut" - or the utterly awful American "ho"? When a man goes out seeking sex (and getting it!) he is labelled as a "stud" - hardly fair is it? In the swinging scene these women are appreciated for their sex drives, assertiveness, and willingness to explore rather than being derided for expressing a very human need.
Many swingers learn a lot about themselves and about otherwise hidden aspects of their natural, latent sexuality. Swingers are less performance driven when it comes to sex and many newcomers are surprised to find that a room full of swingers having sex may not be an all out humping orgy! Whilst this does happen (and at La Chambre we are equipped for it!), you are just as likely to find the entire room in a languid state of heightened arousal where every breath, stroke and lick is savoured like a fine drop of wine. Experienced swingers view some aspects of sex almost as a ritual and have successfully removed performance driven issues from their sex lives. How refreshing to see several flaccid men in a room simply enjoying the experience of being with like minded souls - compared to the new single guys on a Friday night who slink away for fear of being seen not sporting an impressive erection for even a minute.
Swingers relax and learn to appreciate the heights of sexual pleasure and view the gang bangs, orgies, and mass groping sessions as a source of infinite pleasure and intimacy rather than as something to be used as a bargaining tool or a boost to the ego. Swingers learn to relax and accept that their body is no better or worse than the others they will come across (!) in their lifetime and that empathy, sympathy, consideration, mutual respect, and a driving need to explore new boundaries are more important than penis or breast size, age, race, or religion. At La Chambre we celebrate the diversity of our membership and note that our members are far more tolerant of differences (if they notice them at all) than are members of the uninitiated general public.
A word about confidence is appropriate here. We have seen hundreds of people enter the club nervous, worried, anxious about removing their clothing; shy of every bump and perceived wrinkle and scared that they are about to be judged. One of the nicest moments we've ever had was seeing a very very large lady shyly remove her clothes, no doubt fearful of the usual judgemental attitude that she had grown up with. No-one batted an eyelid. No-one commented. No-one laughed or turned away. Everyone appreciated her body for what it was, her personality for who SHE was, and we watched her self confidence increase with every step towards the pool.
That is the essence of swinging - it can instil in you a deeper tolerance of other human beings. It can lift your mind to heights of ecstasy you had never imagined existed simply by removing inhibitions and society-imposed codes which blunt your senses and take away your ability to marvel and feel.
Why Might I Not Want To Swing?
If you are not 100% comfortable with the idea that a complete stranger may find you sexually attractive and deliberately attempt to flirt with you then you probably won't be comfortable at the club. If you are in a relationship that is the slightest bit shaky or are consumed by jealousy then we strongly recommend that you think carefully before joining us.
If either of you has a hidden agenda or is looking for a replacement partner, you're probably in for a major emotional disaster. Similarly if you are entering the swinging scene to "score points" or to "prove a point" you are in for some very rough times. If you are unable to communicate directly with your partner about relationships and sex, your needs, wants, and desires, you're almost certainly going to expose yourself to far more hurt than you can handle. Sex is an activity capable of provoking the most vehement of emotional responses in even the most placid, easy going human being. The complex issues surrounding the life style WILL invoke many emotions and possibly force you to answer questions about yourself that you've never asked before; if you aren't comfortable dealing with emotions, or being forced to take a long, hard look at your attitudes and tolerance levels you should wait and think about it carefully before coming to the club or entering into the life style. It is not for everybody.
In the modern age we are all aware of the dangers of unprotected sex - i.e.: sex without condoms. At many swinging clubs (including La Chambre) safe sex is promoted through the provision of condom machines (see our facilities page to find out where they are) but no-one will force you to buy (or use) them. Many of the couples meet regularly for sex and have the kind of relationship where trust and honesty are so implicit that their perception of any risk is low. At the end of the day it is personal choice but our recommendation would be always use a condom.
You should also note that at La Chambre, all of our play rooms have windows leading to the corridors and rest areas. This means that whilst having sex (even if the room is empty of other people) others may still be able to watch you with your partner. If this disturbs you then either angle yourself away from the windows, move to a place in the room where you are hidden (and most of the rooms have these areas), or don't use the play rooms. There is something many people find deeply erotic about being watched whilst for others it leaves a creepy, soiled feeling. Go with whatever feels best for you and you should be OK. We have a private room should you really want to be alone.
You should always remember that swinging is about personal choice and the freedom to explore your own boundaries. If you are willing to have sex with a stranger you should also be willing to face up to the fact that, sometimes, those strangers may have different attitudes to your own - attitudes which, to you, may seem strange, incomprehensible, or downright dangerous. If your personal border is that you use a dental dam when having oral sex with someone then you should communicate this to your partner; no-one in the swinging scene will look down on you for exercising YOUR personal choice. They may ask why - but this, again, is part of the communication and learning process. We are all travellers on the same road and occasionally even the most travelled people need to stop and ask for directions!
If you have any deep seated phobias against bisexuality, homosexuality, or any of the other "-alities" connected with sex then you should be prepared to rethink your attitudes. If you are bi- or homo-sexual it is unlikely that your preferences will attract any comment but, if they do, then you should be prepared to either ignore any negative comment or embrace the positive. The scene is not for those shy people hiding away in closets!
If you are a single male, you might actually be better off waiting until you are in a suitable relationship before attempting to become active in swinging - most swing clubs allow few if any single men to attend their events. Whilst La Chambre welcomes single men to our Friday Night parties we also know that many of the men who have since found a partner also active in the scene generally get much more out of their Saturday Night experiences. That's not to say Friday nights are not more often that not full of humping bodies, it would be safe to say Saturdays are more party driven and Fridays are more about the sex.
General Hints for Enjoyable Swinging
In the context of swinging, "couples" need not be married. In fact, we know that many of the couples who come to the club are married - they just don't happen to be married to each other. That's one of the reasons why we are VERY careful about who we send the newsletters out to.
The couple should, however, have at least a little history together and familiarity with each others' emotional needs, and be comfortable approaching others as a "couple." Complete strangers pretending to be a couple thrown into a room with lots of genuine couples will not have a good experience in terms of "belonging". The general rule of thumb is that swinging works best when couples view swinging as an enhancement to their existing sexual relationship, rather than as a replacement for a failing one. Make no mistake about it - swinging, wife swapping, call it what you will - cannot save a doomed relationship or a failing marriage; in fact it is likely to exacerbate any problems by dragging a lot of previously hidden emotions and baggage to the surface.
The key to swinging as a couple is communication; good communication and lots of it. You need to be able to speak honestly and forthrightly with each other if you are going to take your relationship further in the life style. There are many, many different forms that swinging may take, and whichever one you choose is fine as long as you and your partner are clear about what you are doing and why.
Sex is a minefield of emotions and the pleasures that can be found in swinging can be reached only when both partners are sensitive to each others needs, and put their partner's comfort first. Insensitivity, selfishness, and point scoring have no place in a relationship dedicated to the life style.
The other side to this is that there will always be another party (every Friday, Saturday and Sunday night at La Chambre!) but there may never be another chance to salvage or repair a relationship damaged because someone forgot to treat their partner with sensitivity, honesty, and respect.
Let's not forget that swinging (especially at a highly liberated club like La Chambre) is a SOCIAL activity. The process of meeting new people, striking up a conversation, having a drink, and getting to know someone at the club is not much different to meeting someone in a "normal" night club. OK, you might decide to have sex with the person within a short space of time and be in an environment which lends itself to doing just that but many people forget that, even though La Chambre is a swinging club where people have sex, the time honoured values of responsibility, respect, friendship, openness, honesty, and trust are even more important particularly in regard to the way in which you treat your partner.
As in every other sphere of human behaviour, you'll probably find it easier to swing with people you've met before. Would you go dancing with people you've never met and feel instantly at home and comfortable with them? Probably not, and it's got to be harder without your clothing right? So, get to the club and watch people. Observe the interactions between groups, get a feel for the behaviour, judge the type of conversations people are having. Perhaps come to the club a few times and simply observe the other people and stick to your own partner for a while. Once you "know the score" and you are able to fit into the group, approach people carefully and with courtesy; you'll be accepted as "one of us" and the road in will be much easier.
Like all groups, swingers exhibit some tribal instincts. This can be apparent in the way people dress, the hairstyles, tattoos, and body jewellery, but it is more apparent in the language used. Put a load of computer programmers together and they speak a strange language of bytes and acronyms the majority of the population simply don't understand. Sometimes this is deliberate - part of the "them and us" syndrome. City dealers do it and so do swingers. You'll hear terms that are utterly incomprehensible but persevere, ask questions and you will receive answers; people like to show off the knowledge they have and the swinging community is a community of sharers.
You'll hear people talk about "closed swinging" - this simply refers to a couple who don't watch each other have sex with other people. You'll hear about "open swinging" where the partners have agreed not to have sex with someone else UNLESS the other partner is watching. You'll hear of "soft swinging" - heavy petting without any penetration taking place apart from with their own partners. "Dogging" - being watched having sex in a car park surrounded by strangers who may be masturbating through the open window of the car. If you are asked to participate in something and you don't know what the word means then ask for an explanation; it avoids misunderstandings and the tribal group sometimes forget that not everyone has learnt the language yet. If you are in any doubt then feel free to ask a member of staff (we've heard everything twice anyway!)
We recommend that you communicate with your partner before you come to the club. Find out what you are both prepared to do, how far you both want to push your boundaries. OK, the goal posts might move when you get here (by mutual agreement of course) but lay out some guideline markers so that if someone does ask you to participate, you'll know in advance if it's something you have specifically agreed NOT to do. If you're asked to do something you, or your partner, are not 100% comfortable with then simply say NO. You can always talk about it later and say YES next time!
Many couples have hidden signals to communicate different feelings to their partner in a way which is invisible to the other person at their table. For example, we know of one lady who asks for a Cranberry Vodka Ice if she doesn't fancy a bloke making a pass at her on a Friday Night. She hates the stuff - her partner likes it and gets the message when she orders a bottle. She is more comfortable doing this, her partner is able to sort an excuse out which doesn't leave the unfancied guy feeling bad - and everyone is happy with the outcome. One couple who use the dark room regularly have an agreement that when the lady says "fag break" it means that she genuinely needs a rest. If she says "Can we go and have a cigarette?" her partner knows that someone is bothering her. This sort of stuff isn't complicated but it can help to smooth possible difficulties and puts you firmly in control of any situation you find yourself in.
Dressing up is something that adds spice to the sex lives of many couples whether involved in the scene or not. How much nicer to flaunt the stunning new lingerie set in front of an audience of hundreds? At La Chambre, we insist that gentlemen dress smartly - no jeans, trainers, or t-shirts, whilst ladies should be dressed as sexily as they wish. Yes, we've got a dress code, but the guiding principle is - are you comfortable. Try to dress in layers, something to socialise in, something deeper to dance in, something to play in. Think about jewellery and please try to make sure it has no sharp edges . If you are coming to a themed party (and our Events Calendar always features a few) please get into the spirit of the occasion and go with the theme. The swinging scene and La Chambre are NOT just about sex - they're also about having fun. The themes are not compulsory but they are appreciated.
Enjoying YourselfAt some point during a Party Night, the chances are that even if you don't have sex you are likely to be getting very close to people. Use some common sense - take a shower, brush your teeth, and (if necessary) shave before showing up. If you like to use your fingers inside your partners as part of sex, don't forget to clip your fingernails short. At La Chambre we have a number of rest rooms where our members can freshen up and this includes the use of hair dryers for the ladies. Remember - nobody likes a minger!
You will no doubt have remembered to bring your towel to the club so if you decide to wash or shower during the night, please be careful not to use somebody else's towel or washcloth on your eyes or genitals. Courtesy, common sense, and respect - remember!
Sometimes whilst you are socialising (or playing) a new couple may be given a tour of the club. Whilst no-one expects you to stop what you're doing it is good form to at least acknowledge the newcomers (a grunted "see you later" is better than ignoring them!). The pool is a good place to get involved in conversations with people; most people at swinging events are more than happy to answer questions and talk about their experience of the scene. Don't be afraid to socialise, ask questions, accept compliments and preen a little when people tell you how fantastic you look.
Unless you've decided beforehand, you should stay with your partner for the duration of the Party. If you have decided to split up and have fun separately that's OK but don't just abandon your partner and go off on your own; an abandoned partner can quickly became a jealous and emotional partner. We aren't talking about just the ladies here - the men are not emotional deserts and we can feel abandoned too! Remember, at the club everyone is here to have fun with their friends. Of course issues will arise from time to time that mean you and your partner need to have a private or serious discussion, particularly if you are about to push another boundary and need to communicate with each other first. It's polite to do this somewhere a little more private and at La Chambre we've got lots of places where people can be alone and chat for a while. If you need to spend some quality time together without fear of interruption we have a private room available if you need it (see the facilities page for more information).
Traditions at clubs vary and many venues have only one or two rooms where the "gang bangs" and orgies take place. At La Chambre we've got five plus the pool, the sauna and the steam room (not to mention the dance floor and the dungeons)! Whilst there is no specific etiquette for any of our rooms please note that the mood may be different from room to room. Some rooms reverberate with laughter, others are a pool of tranquillity - use your judgement and choose a room which matches your mood. The atmosphere in the club is sexy - particularly upstairs and watching and showing off is encouraged. Whilst it is not considered bad manners to watch, it IS considered bad manners to go and sit down next to someone and stare at them. Use common sense and think about how you would feel in a similar situation.
And so to the question of the demon drink; Is alcohol a good thing or a bad thing when swinging? This largely depends on how you handle your alcohol! We strongly recommend that you don't drink to excess on your first visit or while you and your partner are still new to the scene. Having your first experience whilst absolutely hammered out of your skull is not conducive to leaving you feeling good about it in the morning. There is also the issue of drinking and driving - whilst our staff will try to prevent you from getting too incapacitated (and they have removed car keys in the past!) we cannot do anything more than point you to a local hotel. People having sex when they've had a few drinks is fine but there is nothing pretty about two piss heads getting it on! Too much alcohol will leave you wondering whether you had sex with someone because you were pissed or whether you exercised freedom of choice in a conscious effort to broaden your horizons.
The most important aspect of Enjoying Yourself is to keep track of where you are, where your partner is, are you within the limits you mentally set yourselves and communicated to each other, and are you doing what you want to do whilst respecting other peoples limits and boundaries? If you don't want to have sex with someone, just say NO - tactfully and courteously. You always have the right to say NO to anything, and if someone doesn't take NO for an answer you should always report it to a member of staff. At La Chambre we frown on people who do not respect the personal limits, boundaries, and choices of our members and we have been known to terminate memberships in order to enforce this policy.
Sometime, sooner rather than later, someone you approach will say "No thanks". Don't take offence, wonder what's wrong with you, ask yourself if they think you or your partner are ugly, beat yourself up, or think you are a bad person. Accept it graciously and never say "WHY NOT??"
The Green Eyed MonsterThe topic of jealousy often comes up as a topic of conversation amongst swingers. Everyone has an opinion, everyone is affected by it, and we all acknowledge the deadly power and havoc it can play if allowed to roam unchecked through a relationship between two people who swing. We aren't just talking about the dynamics of a loving couple who share their bodies, minds, and souls with others for the first time; although this can be a difficult experience for many. We are also talking about what happens when one of the partners is suddenly the life and soul of the party!
There is a saying which you will hear sooner or later at any gathering of swingers. "The most enthusiastic partner may get a couple swinging but the least enthusiastic will keep them doing it." What this means is that one of the partners (usually the man!) will initiate the move into the swinging scene and the other partner (most often the lady) will reluctantly acknowledge that this most private fantasy might be fun to try in real life. They arm themselves with an overnight bag crammed with condoms and sexy clothing, head off to La Chambre and the unthinkable happens; the lady loves it, shags everything that moves, and wants to keep coming back. The man is left at the sidelines watching a side of his partner he has never seen blossom not only before his eyes but in front of bastards he's never even met!
The strange dynamism of jealousy in action. Or, put another way, the green eyed monster is back.
Jealousy can be powered by several deep seated human emotions. First of all is that of scarcity; in other words, many people believe that their partne r has only a limited amount of love to go round - it is a scarce commodity and if my partner is sharing so much of it with other people, what if there isn't enough left for me ? Second comes insecurity; perhaps I'm not good enough for my partner - what if no-one wants to play with me - what if they start thinking they would be better off with someone else - what if my lady meets someone bigger who can keep it harder and going for longer..... The list is endless and it can hurt. Deeply.
Jealously usually arises not because we fear something good might be taken away from us but because we fear someone else might get it instead. Turn the paradox around - "Imagine if my partner shared intimacy with lots of other people I might get jealous. Now imagine that every time they shared or had sex some of their pleasure got stored up inside them so that when they share with me I get even more pleasure." Would jealousy be such a big issue then? If you were to receive a "reward" as a side effect of your partner being intimate with others?
As always with swinging, the key is communication. By communicating effectively, ensuring that agreements made outside the club are honoured inside it, by reiterating your commitment to each other, by measuring and treasuring the love you have for each other, and listening to and dealing with emotional seriously you should be able to ensure that the fleeting pangs of jealousy are nothing more than a reminder of your depth of feeling for each other.
And with a bit of a nod towards The Drifters - "I won't forget who's taking you home and in whose arms you're gonna be, oh darling save the last shag for me" .
Personal AdsLet's get something out of the way; many of the top shelf contact magazines are nothing more than advertisements for prostitutes and escort agencies. Now whilst this is not the forum in which to expand our views of "paid for sex" we should make it clear that these magazines generally are not associated with the swinging scene. Yes, they have latched onto the upsurge in swinging as more people become more open about their lifestyle, but many newcomers equate these occasionally dubious publications with the real swinging scene. Some of the other advertisements are from picture collectors and individuals who are dishonestly claiming to be part of a couple when in reality they are single (or screwing around without telling their life partner or significant other).
Occasionally, a genuine couple will advertise in these magazines because they don't know of the existence of clubs like La Chambre but they would like to meet other couples and singles.
When arranging to meet someone from a contact magazine there are precautions you should take and, since they are common sense, we won't reiterate them here. However, everyone knows that you should meet on neutral ground so, if you are going to meet a stranger from an advertisement why not arrange to meet at La Chambre? If the initial contact doesn't work out then at least you'll all be able to meet other genuine swingers and not waste an evening of your life!
HealthEvery one in the swinging scene has been affected by the march of HIV and AIDS in different ways. Some have simply ignored it, others have wrapped themselves up so securely in safe sex that they can no longer feel anything, and still others have dropped out of the scene altogether. At La Chambre we encourage safe sex through the provision of condom machines within the club. Some younger swingers may have never even known a time when the use of lubes and condoms was not essential and so practising the skills necessary to safely enjoy your life style is essential. As with most things connected to the swinging scene, whether you choose to practise safe sex is a matter of personal choice - we include this information to help you make an INFORMED personal choice.
Basic StuffWithout doubt the most effective thing you can do to stay safe is to use a condom for forms of penetrative sex. Most swingers use condoms, most expect their use, and some demand them.
Condom technology is getting better and innovations such as Durex Easy On have made them easier to use, more comfortable, and a whole lot more sensitive. If you aren't used to condoms and you don't get along with a particular brand try a different one - there are hundreds of them out there. Our personal favourites ? Durex Featherlite and Durex Avanti which is made of polyurethane rather than Latex.
Obviously, you should use a new condom for each new partner. Don't wear the same one all night! If you are going to be switching between vaginal and anal intercourse you should also use a new condom (not doing this can lead to vaginal infections!). If you are going to use fingers inside your partner don't put an "anus" finger inside the vagina unless you've washed your hands in hot soapy water. We have ladies and gents bathrooms right outside the playrooms.
Oral SexOpinions about the use of barrier methods of protection for oral sex are are wide and varied. Herpes can be transmitted during unprotected oral sex but there are arguments that the disease cannot be transmitted unless the sores are visible. There ARE recorded cases of the HIV virus being transmitted through unprotected oral sex but a lot of swingers dismiss this as a cause for concern due to the low probability of transmission and the low incidence of the virus in the community. Again, and we are conscious of making this point more than once, personal choice plays a role here.
If you aren't going to use barrier protection for oral sex there are a few things you can do to help protect yourself.
Don't floss before a party. Flossing can cause the gums to bleed which allows pathogens to enter during oral sex.Don't let men cum in your mouth.Don't go down on a woman whilst she is menstruating.If you decide that you want to use a barrier method then a condom is as good as anything when a lady is practising oral sex on a man. It is also possible to purchase "dental dams" which rest against the vulva allowing cunnilingus to be performed without a significant loss of sensation.
It should be noted that most swingers don't use barrier methods for oral sex and at the club you will see women happily getting a mouth full of cum and men happily nibbling at a ladies nether regions - skin to skin. However, you should discuss all of these issues with your partner and set your own limits. Ask yourself a simple question - "Am I comfortable with the thought of kissing my partner when they've just licked a pussy or swallowed cum?" Now do you see why you need to talk?
HandsIf you've just had your fingers in an arse or a vagina or had someone cum all over your hands it is a good idea to avail yourself of one of our many sinks or showers (check out the facilities to remind yourself where they are!).
If you don't want to keep dashing off to wash your hands, you can get very thin latex gloves from the chemists.
And whether you use gloves or not, a little water based lubricant certainly won't do any harm and will actually improve your partners experience if you intend to play with their arse.
Safer Sex KitsSo you've decided where to set your safe-sex markers, how far you'll go, what you and your partner have agreed is safe within your personal framework and you're all geared for a hot party night at La Chambre. How are you going to carry this stuff around? Here's some ideas that won't get in the way:
A bum bag. Cheap and cheerful will do and you can also keep your cigarettes and lighter in it!
A pair of shorts. If you're one of those guys who prefers a pair of shorts to a towel wear a pair with pockets - it don't get easier than that.
A towel pouch. Gents, you might need a hand here from your lady unless you can wield a needle and thread. Get a piece of material (or cut the corner off your towel) and stitch it to the long side of your towel on three sides so it's open at the top. Put a slit through it and stitch a small button on it. You've now got a condom size pocket on the front of your towel.
Something you should remember is that once a couple have set their safe-sex limits they are unlikely to move them (many of the men check you've got a condom on if the lady wants it that way!) so it makes sense to be prepared. We heard about one night in the Manhattan Skyline Room when a young lady was gagging for some action but wouldn't let anyone near her without a condom. Unbelievably, only one of the ten guys had a condom on his person and when the others came back from the (now long!) queue at the condom machine, he was sat downstairs enjoying a post-coital drink and she was in the Private Room with her partner. Moral? BE PREPARED.